


On Fire in the Realm of the Senses

by michele659



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Angst, BDSM, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-22
Updated: 2012-02-24
Packaged: 2017-10-31 14:45:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/345274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/michele659/pseuds/michele659
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny becomes obsessed with Steve and is afraid to let him know.</p><p>Based on this song prompt from Serena Ryder's "Weak in the Knees."<br/>"Would you mind if I walked over and I kissed your face<br/>In front of all your friends?<br/>Would you mind if I got drunk and said<br/>I want to take you home to bed?<br/>Oh,would you change your mind?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N:Written for the After Holidays Prompt Fest at Steve/Danno slash
> 
> I ended up using the whole song because it fit so well with the story!  
> Thanks to : abbeyroad 62561and wintermute_lj for looking this over and giving me feedback! Any mistakes are my own.

~~~

_Would you mind if we pretended we were somewhere else?_

_Doing something we wanted to do?_ __

~~

It’s nights like these that make Danny get out of bed and into his car, driving aimlessly.

Nights when he can’t sleep because each time he starts to drift off he begins to dream.

And the dreams are driving him crazy.

He dreams of himself on his knees, stripped, naked.

His eyes so full of want it makes him sick.

Waiting.

The object of his fevered desires is always the same.

Steve.

Steve is fully clothed in these dreams: teasing, taunting, always just out of reach.

Not that Danny doesn’t try and reach him.

 In his dreams he reaches out, hands aching to touch, wanting to run his fingers up and down Steve’s body.

Aching to feel Steve’s skin against his own.

Imagining what it would feel like.

Silky and soft to the touch.

Imagining what it would taste like.

Slightly salty from the ocean, from sweat. Slightly sweet and musky.

But Steve always stays just out of reach, a smile playing on his lips.

Playing with him.

In his dreams Steve knows how much he wants him and he plays with him.

Even in his fucking dreams Steve McGarrett is out of reach.

***

So Danny finds himself on the highway, driving down to the beach of all places, and he walks.

Some nights he runs.

He goes home and pounds a speed bag he recently bought to alleviate some of his frustration.

Nothing helps.

He drinks coffee to stay awake.

Anything to keep those dreams and the taunting image of Steve out of his mind.

*****

 _‘Cause all this living makes me want to do,_ __

_Is die ‘cause I can’t live with you,_ __

_And you don’t even care_ __

~~~~

He starts to fall asleep at work, which, of course does not go unnoticed by the team.

“Maybe you should take a couple of days off, Danny,” Steve suggests, and Danny can hear the worry in his voice.

He hates him for it.

He hates him for the soft tone his voice takes when he says it.

It’s like a goddamn caress and damn if it doesn’t make him shiver, just a little.

“I’m fine, Steve,” he says, trying and failing to keep the frustration out of his voice.

“You are so not fine, Danno. Why won’t you tell me what’s bothering you? Maybe I can help. That’s what partners are for, isn’t it?”

Danny wants to laugh but knows it’ll only come out sounding bitter and strangled. He imagines the look on Steve’s face if Danny told him exactly what kind of help he wanted.

“Look, don’t worry about me, I’m ok. I’m just having a little trouble sleeping is all.”

“Danny, you never have trouble sleeping. If anything, I have to give you several wake up calls when we have early cases. So, something is keeping you from sleeping.”

“Forget about it, will you?” Danny sighs. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you. Maybe you’re right. I should take a few days off.” He suddenly thinks it would be a good idea to get away from the object of what is rapidly becoming his obsession.”I’ll just finish up my paperwork and leave.”

Steve nods and lays his hand on Danny’s arm.

“If you need anything, let me know.”

Danny can only nod because his body is burning up from Steve’s touch.

He swears he can feel the imprint of Steve’s hands on him even after Steve leaves.

***  

Unfortunately, having time away from the office does nothing to cool his obsession.

New dreams have been added to the ones he already has about himself and Steve.

Danny begins to think that Steve must’ve learned some techniques in SEAL school that include telepathic torture.

It’s the only reasonable explanation.

He sees Steve coming out of the water, the water making his suit cling to his body, outlining every part of it.

Water’s dripping off him and in his dream Danny goes to him and –

 _Starts to lick it off his body._ __

_Every fucking drop of it_ __

_Down his body until Danny’s on his goddamn knees once again._ __

_Begging ._ __

Sometimes Steve gives him permission-lets him slowly pull down his shorts, touch his cock, take it in his mouth.

Other times Steve just smiles and walks away.

These dreams always end up with Danny waking up, gasping.

Steve’s name on his lips.

The sheets tangled around him, wet with sweat and come.

Danny doesn’t even bother stripping-he just stumbles to the shower and turns the cold water on.

Sleep evades him the rest of the night.

He realizes he’s going crazy.

Going down- so far down.

****  

 _Would you mind if I pretended I was someone else,_ __

_With courage in love and war,_ __

_I used to think that’s what I was,_ __

_But now this lying hurts too much,_ __

_And I don’t know what for…._ __

~~~~

While he’s away from the office, Danny decides that he should spend time with Grace.

He’s happy when he’s with her, and for a few moments he can actually forget about Steve.

Well, he would be able to if Grace would stop talking about him all the damn time.

“When’s Uncle Steve coming over?” “Why isn’t he here?” “I want Uncle Steve to watch me surf. Please, Daddy, can we call him?”

Danny gets so upset he almost yells at Grace, but he holds himself back and reminds her that Uncle Steve is at work and can’t be here, but that Daddy will watch her surf. He’s in the middle of this explanation when he hears Grace yell, “Uncle Steve” as she happily runs into his arms.

Danny glares at him.

Why is he here? This is Danny’s time off- time with his kid, time away from Steve.

Danny knows Steve couldn’t possibly know the last part, but still-

Why is he here?

He’s not just here-he’s looking like he did in Danny’s dream, minus the wetness.

He has those shorts on though, and Danny panics at the thought that Steve will want to swim.

If he swims then Danny will have the same image that was in his dream in front of him in real life.

He is so not going to let that happen. He couldn’t deal with that, especially not with Gracie here!

He doesn’t get a chance to say anything, however, because Grace is telling Steve that she was going surfing and does he want to go, too?

Steve grins and says he’ll get his board and what about Danny? Doesn’t he want to surf too?

Danny shakes his head. Kono’s just starting to teach him.

“I’ll be happy to teach you,” Steve says with a smile. Danny smiles back as he thinks of all the ways he’d like to kill Steve.

“No, that’s ok.”

“Please, Danno!” Grace pleads and smiles but Danny says no, it’ll take away from their time if he does that.

He can’t look at Steve as he says this; because he’s sure Steve knows he’s lying.

He can’t have Steve teach him because he can’t deal with Steve’s hands on his hips, Steve’s chest against him, so close that Danny could lean back and rest against him.

So Grace waits for Steve and the two of them go surfing.

Danny is taken, as he always is, with the gentle way Steve has around Grace.

When Steve comes out of the water Danny closes his eyes, cursing the fates that brought him to this place and this man.

***  

“Talk to me, Danny,” Steve implores, after they’ve taken Grace home and are sitting on Steve’s deck. “You’ve been acting weird lately. Well, weirder than usual,” he adds and laughs at his own joke.

“Yeah, you crack yourself up, don’t you Steve?” Danny asks, but he smiles too because he can’t NOT smile when Steve smiles at him.

God, he’s pathetic.

“Nothing’s wrong,” he says.

“Liar,” Steve whispers and takes a sip of his beer.

Danny watches as his lips rest around the top of the bottle and he drinks.

Watches him swallow.

Danny gets up so quickly he starts to sway, and Steve reaches to hold him up.

“Are you ok?” he asks, and there’s so much concern in his eyes that Danny wants to kiss him.

“I’m fine,” he moves out of Steve’s grasp and tries to calm down.

He can’t even have a beer with the man without thinking about how Steve’s lips would look wrapped around his cock. How Steve would look taking Danny all the way down, swallowing him.

“Fuck!” he yells, because damn it he should have better control of himself!

“What’s the matter?” Steve looks confused now and Danny sighs and shakes his head.

“Nothing-look, I’ve gotta go. I-need to get some sleep.”

Steve starts to say something, but Danny says goodbye before he has a chance to form a sentence.

 That night Danny dreams of Steve once again.

**

 _Honey I’m weak,_ __

_Over you…._ __

~~~~~

Weak.

He’s become what he always hated.

Weak.

Brought to his knees by his desire, by his need.

Brought to his knees by the power of his _want._

So fucking weak.

***  

 _Would you mind if I walked over and kissed your face,_ __

_In front of all of your friends? …_ __

_~~~~_ __

It’s a slippery slope once you begin an obsession.

Danny finds this out when he starts to know when Steve was in a room because he can still feel him, smell his scent.

He picks up the towel Steve throws down in the locker room-and inhales.

He caresses objects Steve has touched, imagining the feel of Steve’s fingers.

Danny watches Steve lick suck the cream out of a Twinkie and almost falls off his chair.

He tries to tell Steve that he has some cream on the corner of his mouth- “right there”, and Steve touches everywhere but the place Danny is pointing to.

Danny gets mad and winds up taking the cream off the side of his face himself.

His finger lingers for a moment on Steve’s face before he realizes what he’s doing and quickly removes it.

He swears there was a glimmer of understanding in Steve’s eyes, but he could’ve been wrong about that.

**

Over the course of the next week, Danny becomes increasingly suspicious.

He has the feeling Steve knows Danny’s attracted to him (though of course he doesn’t know how obsessed Danny is with him).

He’s almost positive Steve knows when he licks his fingers the next time he eats a Twinkie.

He’s looking at Danny the whole time, the ghost of a smile is on his lips.

Danny wonders what Steve would think if he got up and kissed him in front of Kono and Chin. Just got up and kissed him on his lips, pulling him out of his chair with the force of it.

But Danny is weak and can’t bring himself to do that, so he pretends the sight of Steve running his tongue up and down each finger, the sight of him sucking the cream off his finger doesn’t make him want to moan, doesn’t make him want to have Steve on his knees for a change.

On his knees with Danny’s cock in his mouth.

And that’s all Danny can take, so he storms out of the office and goes out in his car.

It’s his only refuge lately.

***

 

 _I’m weak in the knees for you,_ __

_But I’ll stand if you want me to…_ __

_~~~~_

Danny’s never been much for casual relationships and even less for one night stands. However, another week of half sleep and fevered dreams leaves him desperate for a distraction.

 Anyone who can make him forget Steve.

He tries to lose himself in other lips, other bodies, other touches.

It doesn’t work.

He thinks of Steve while they’re touching him, kissing him.

He thinks of Steve when he’s deep inside someone, when they’re deep inside him.

Danny sees Steve’s face and pretends it’s his hands, his lips, and his body.

It makes him lonely, aching- empty.

He goes back night after night though, always hoping the next one will be different.

End of Chapter 1


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danny's obsession with Steve reaches an explosive point,forcing Danny to leave the team and Steve behind.  
> Steve is determined to keep that from happening and find out what's destroying Danny.  
> The question is what will happen if he does find out the truth?

_I’m weak in the knees for you,_

_But I’ll stand if you want me to…_

**~~~~**

“Wow, you look like hell!” Steve says to him on the morning after one of those encounters. He smiles when he says it, but there’s worry in his eyes.

He comes close to Danny and breathes into his neck, frowning. “You smell like sex,” he says in an almost accusatory tone.

Every hair on the back of Danny’s neck stands up, as much from the accusation in Steve’s tone as from the heat of his breath.

“Announce it, why don’t you? And what’s with the tone? Aren’t I allowed to have a sex life, or is that only reserved for the SEAL stud?”

Steve holds up his hands and says, “Whoa, sorry. I – I’m just surprised that you didn’t tell me you had a girlfriend is all.”

“Who said I had a girlfriend? You’ve never heard of one night stands, Steve? “

Steve looks so shocked that Danny feels like laughing-except that it would take too much energy.

“I didn’t think you did that sort of thing, Danny.”

“That sort of thing?  What sort of thing would that be, Steven?  Have sex? Have one night stands? What is the part that you think I don’t do?”

“I didn’t think you had casual sex,” Steve actually blushes and Danny shakes his head.

“Steve-that’s all I have,” Danny rubs his face in that way he does when he’s aggravated and Steve says. “Oh, I didn’t know that. You never used to. You used to say all the time that you wanted to find someone and-“

“Yeah,” Danny cuts him off because he really does not want to hear how stupid he sounded before this obsession with his partner started, “well, we don’t always get what we want.”

“I’m sure you could have it, Danny. If it’s what you wanted. Plenty of women would want you.”

‘Yeah.,” he shakes his head. “Look, Steve, I don’t want to have this conversation with you now. Or, ever.” He gets out of his chair and Steve calls after him.

“Where are you going?”

“Well, since I smell like sex according to you I guess I should take a shower.”

“Danny-“

“I’m fine, Steve,” he says.

But as he walks away he thinks he’s not fine and probably never will be.

***  

Danny lets the hot water fall over him, trying to wash the scent of sex off him.

Jesus, he’s really gone too far when he comes to work without even taking a shower.

He woke up so late that he barely had time to get to work, but that wasn’t enough of an excuse.

He wonders if he wanted Steve to smell the sex on him, wanted to see a reaction.

Well, he saw one, but it wasn’t the one he was hoping for.

Steve looked surprised, hurt almost (but apparently just because Danny hadn’t told him about what he thought was a “relationship”) and then, what? Confused, disappointed?

Danny sighed, thinking that he was definitely wrong about Steve having an idea that Danny was attracted to him.

Apparently Steve the “Ultimate Heterosexual” couldn’t fathom that Danny might’ve been with a man.

Not that he’d ever mentioned his attraction to other men to Steve, but then it never really came up.

And anyway, in the time he’d known Steve the only man (hell, the only person male or female) that Danny was attracted to was Steve.

He closed his eyes as he soaped his body, imagining Steve’s hands on him. Feeling the heat from Steve’s hands searing his body, seeing Steve holding him, his hands sliding down Danny’s body, reaching around to his cock, jerking him off hot and fast, or taking him from behind.

He fantasizes that Steve was jealous at the thought of another man’s hands on Danny and tries to wipe away any imprint by taking the soap and scrubbing Danny’s body, hard, then licking him, biting him, claiming him.

“Fuck,” Danny hits the shower wall with his hand, turns the cold water on full blast, slides down to the floor of the shower and stays like that for as long as he can take it.

***     

_My legs are strong and I’ll move on…_

_~~~~_

“Happy you decided to join us,” Steve says in a sarcastic tone.

“Blow me,” Danny replies, and it’s the kind of thing he would’ve said before this obsession started, only now it doesn’t sound light and teasing. Now he winces because –yeah, he’d love it if Steve would blow him.

Steve remains sullen throughout the briefing of their latest case, and Danny finally blows up.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” he yells, and Steve gives him the aneurysm face and Kono and Chin look confused.

“Nothing, Daniel,” Steve draws out the Daniel until it’s almost four syllables and Chin and Kono get up and leave, muttering something about going for lunch and insane bosses.

“Ok, now what is your fucking problem?” Danny asks again.

“I think I should be asking you that,” Steve replies.

“Wait, what? What are you talking about Steve?”

“I mean that you’re letting your ‘personal’ life interfere with your work, and that’s unacceptable.”

“Oh, really? Because it seems to me that you let your personal life interfere with work and that’s ok!”

“When do I do that?”

“Seriously, Steve are you kidding me? You do it all the time!”

“I’m not talking about letting personal feelings into a case. I’m talking about your personal life interfering with your ability to do your job.”

Danny is stunned for a moment, and then he throws his hands up in the air.

“Fine. You know, you’re right. I can’t do my job right because I’m having personal problems. So, guess what I’m going to do? I’m going to put in for a transfer back to HPD, and if I can’t get it I’m going to quit!”

“Danny, what the fuck? You’re just going to leave the team because we’re having an argument?”

“Yes, Steve, this is all about you. No, not because we’re having an argument. Because I am having personal problems and I can’t work properly, and I don’t want to be here if that’s the case.”

“But-Danny, I’m your friend-we’re your friends-“

“All the more reason why I shouldn’t be here. I’m bound to lose focus on a job sooner or later, and when that happens I could get one of you hurt.”

“Danny!” All of a sudden Steve looks panicked and gets in Danny’s face, puts his hands on his shoulders.”You can’t leave!”

Danny laughs and he realizes how bitter it sounds.

“I’m already gone, babe,” he tells Steve, and goes to his office to call HPD.

He’s told he can transfer in another two weeks.

Until then he’ll leave the team, wait at home.

He sighs, and for the first time in a long time he thinks maybe, just maybe he’ll sleep tonight.

***

He does fall asleep, but the dreams come too fast and overwhelm him.

He has a replay of his fantasy in the shower, and his hips move rhythmically in time with the imagined thrusts of Steve’s cock inside him, and his skin shines with sweat from his fevered tossing and turning.

Then the dream changes and Steve is drinking a beer, licking the foam off his lips.

And Danny gets in between Steve’s legs and slides up his body to lick it off his mouth.

That lick turns into another and then another, and then it becomes a tongue bath along Steve’s neck and chest, down his stomach and down to his cock.

Danny starts rimming Steve-reveling in the taste of him, burying himself inside him with his mouth and then his cock.

He holds Steve close and rocks them, softly at first and then setting up a pounding, almost punishing rhythm.

But Steve loves it; they both do.

***

 

The days crawl by as Danny waits for his transfer to HPD to come through.

Steve calls him several times a day, but Danny doesn’t want to talk to him.

He doesn’t want to talk to anyone.

Kono and Chin come over, and Danny tries to reassure them that he’s just burnt out from the job, and once he’s back to a regular schedule he’ll be fine.

They know he’s lying because he was fine before his obsession with Steve made it impossible to sleep or function. He ranted a lot, but that was just the way he was. He liked to vent.

He loved the job and he loved the team, and he would’ve been happy staying there forever.

Until Steve Fucking McGarrett wrapped himself around Danny’s body and soul and just fucking _squeezed._

_Squeezed until there was no breath left in him._

_Steve took the air right out of his lungs._

_Took space inside him, took the fuck over._

_Took his heart, too._

Steve comes by at different times from Kono and Chin, and he begs Danny to tell him what the hell is going on.

Danny doesn’t, of course.

** 

Danny starts feeling alternately desperate and numb and it scares him.

The one night stands are doing nothing for him.

He keeps searching their eyes for something that reminds him of Steve. But something is always missing.

They don’t have the same light in their eyes, or the same softness in their smiles.

Their skin isn’t as smooth, their bodies not as hard, as finely muscled, as goddamn sexy as Steve’s.

They don’t smell like him.

Their touch isn’t the same. It’s either too rough or too gentle (and Danny wonders just when he turned into fucking _Goldilocks, for Christ’s sake)._

He tries some S&M clubs, and he pushes his limits every time.

He waits longer and longer to use his safe word, hoping that physical pain will overwhelm the pain he’s feeling inside.

It doesn’t work.

His body is aching and his heart is still just as broken.

Danny is still Steve McGarrett’s hostage.

**

Danny loses it the day he finds out that his placement in HPD has been temporarily put on hold.

He knows-he KNOWS it’s due to Steve. It has to be. Everything was fine and in order for him to transfer, and now all of a sudden it’s on hold without any explanation.

He storms over to 5-0 headquarters (after his ten voicemails are ignored) and is ready to give Steve a piece of his mind,(and his fist) only to find the place deserted.

The team is out on a case, apparently.

Danny sits down in Steve’s chair, so full of rage and loss he doesn’t know what to do or where to direct it.

He looks around and the memories rush over him like one of those waves Kono was trying to teach him to ride.

Memories of him and Steve: laughing, joking, fighting, talking.

He feels the imprint of Steve’s body on the chair, and the warmth fills him.

The adrenaline leaves him and he feels defeated.

Weak, so fucking weak.

He leaves Steve a note:

_Stay out of my life._

_Please._

And he walks away once more.

*** 

It’s after three in the morning when he returns home from the club.

He’s bruised and he’s sore, and what’s even worse is that he didn’t come once tonight.

He’s can’t wait to take a shower and then hopefully pass out.

He’s so fucking tired.

*** 

_Would you mind if I got drunk and said,_

_“I want to take you home to bed”, oh_

_Would you change your mind?_

_~~~~~_

Steve is sitting in the dark, waiting for him.

His face is filled with worry and his eyes look sad, and for one moment Danny is so relieved all he wants to do is throw himself into Steve’s arms and kiss him.

Then the anger returns, because didn’t he tell Steve to leave him alone?

So he says, “What the fuck are you doing here? Didn’t you get my note, asking you, no –begging you to stay out of my life-please?’

Steve says nothing, just watches Danny warily, and Danny wants to punch something, anything.

Preferably Steve’s face.

“I got your note,” he says, finally. “I just- I couldn’t stay away. I’m worried about you. We all are.”

“Well, that’s great,” Danny says. “But maybe you should’ve thought about that before you fucked up my transfer to HPD. It doesn’t matter, you know. I’m not coming back to 5-0. I’m  done. I told you that.”

Steve doesn’t deny sabotaging Danny’s transfer. He just continues looking at him with that strange, worried expression on his face.

“What?” Danny asks, frustrated.

Steve gets up and walks over to Danny; touches the bruise on his neck.

“Stop that! Why are you touching me?” Danny tries to bat his hand away, but Steve’s tracing a line down his neck, looking for further bruises, and his touch is doing things to Danny’s brain and his body and he feels like he’s falling again.

That touch that burns through him and makes him feel like he’s going to spontaneously combust.

How could such a gentle touch do that to him?

He waits a moment too long to move away and finds himself leaning into the touch.

“What’s happened, Danny?” Steve is whispering, and Danny can hear the confusion, the _hurt_ in his voice. “What’s happened to you? What’s happened to us? Did I do something to hurt you, something to drive you away?”

“What do you mean, us? “ Danny asks, and he’s having a hard time focusing because Steve is still _touching him._

“How did you get these bruises?” Steve asks, as he pushes Danny’s shirt away from his shoulder.

“Stop that, and answer me. What do you mean- us? Why did you say what happened to us?” Danny’s aware that he’s barely breathing, but he doesn’t want to take a chance of missing what Steve is saying.

Steve doesn’t stop, though. He keeps touching, and Danny knows if Steve doesn’t stop soon he is going to do something he’s sure he will regret.

Finally he looks up at Danny and says, “I mean-we were so close. I felt –very close to you. I thought you felt the same. And then all of a sudden you changed. You got distant and sad, and angry and – _haunted._ Like you were seeing ghosts, being chased by something that wouldn’t let go.  You wouldn’t talk to me, wouldn’t let me in. I thought maybe I’d done something.”

Danny laughs and he can tell he sounds hysterical.

“Yeah, you did something. Look, Steve, forget it. It’s useless trying to explain it, and it doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Of course it matters, Danny! You’re hurting and you won’t let me help you.” He brings his hand to Danny’s face and caresses it. “Why won’t you let me help you?”

“You’d hate me if I told you,” Danny says so softly that Steve almost doesn’t hear him.

“There’s nothing that you could say that would make me hate you.”

“Really?” Danny laughs, and he realizes at that moment that he’s already paying the price for his feelings, so why not tell Steve?

At least he’ll get Steve to leave him alone, and then maybe he can finally break free from this obsession.

Maybe he can finally rest.

“Ok. What would you say if I told you that the only thing I’ve wanted to do for months, hell, probably since I’ve known you- is take you to bed? The only thing I’ve wanted to do. It’s all I think about, and when I try and sleep it’s all I dream about. It’s the reason I had to leave the team. The reason I have one night stands. I want to feel something that isn’t about you but all that happens is I end up with people who look like you!” He pokes Steve in the chest, feeling the anger resurface in him. “You want to know why I have these bruises? I got them because I was trying to feel something. I was getting numb, desperate. I needed to –“ He gives up at that point, because Steve is just looking at him, and Danny is sure that the look means “You disgust me,” or, “You’re insane.”

“Danny,” Steve’s voice has that tone again.

That strangled, pain filled tone.

He closes the small gap between them and grabs Danny, hugging him so hard it hurts.

“What are you doing? Steve- did you hear a word I said? “

Then he stops talking and stops breathing again because Steve is stroking his hair, caressing his back, touching him.

And he’s weak in the knees again, so weak.

“I heard you, I heard you,” Steve whispers and Danny can feel the self control he’s built up around Steve start to crumble.

He wants badly to reach out to him, but he’s still so afraid.

For the life of him he doesn’t know what Steve’s touches mean.

Is he worried about Danny? Does he feel concern, guilt?

This doesn’t feel like guilt.

It feels like desire.

It feels like love.

But Danny hasn’t spent all these months torturing himself with the idea that Steve would never feel the same way about him for nothing so he has to ask.

“Steve, what are you doing?”

Steve doesn’t answer him, just mumbles things like “such a fool,” “why didn’t you tell me” and “you hurt yourself, what’s wrong with you? “and keeps holding onto Danny.

Finally, he pushes Danny away and says, “Ask me the question.”

“What question?” Danny asks, bewildered.

“The one you asked before. Ask me again.”

“Oh, that makes it much clearer,” Danny says, sarcastically.

Then he realizes what Steve is asking and exhales sharply.

“What would you say if I told you  the only thing I’ve wanted to do since I met you is take you to bed?”

Steve locks eyes with Danny and smiles.

“Yes. I’d say yes.”

Danny wants so much to make sure he heard right, that this isn’t one of his hallucinations or lust filled dreams.

Then Steve kisses him and he knows it’s real.

No hallucination or dream felt like this.

He feels consumed, feels connected, feels-loved.

And that’s better than any dream he’s had.

He doesn’t mind feeling weak because now he knows Steve is just as weak...

For him.

 

                          ~~~~

                       The End

 

 

 

 

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